On The Logic Of The Foolish

Foolish people never learn.

That is, what experience and life teaches them never really sticks. They remember it while the licks are still fresh, but as soon as the flesh cools down, the memory of the lesson supposed to be learned vanishes like morning mist towards the midday.

There is a reason why we say, "history repeats itself." 

The most common is that because it does. If you want to go academic, there are plenty of proof that this is true; the Dialectic, the Principle of Socio-Political Cyclical Movement, Psycho-Social Patterns etc. Even the Bible says, "That which hath been is now: and that which is to be hath already been".

Given this premise, it is then logical that we really should "learn from our mistakes", or "heed the wisdom of those who have gone before" or "remember the lessons of the past for reference to the future". Because if history repeats itself, it follows that the difficulties that come with it also repeats itself. In which case if you've encountered a particular problem in the past, you will encounter it again today or tomorrow and you're in trouble if you don't remember how you can solve it.

This truth applies not only to singular aspects of life but in multiple occurrences in a several alternate planes.

After all a man is not just a man. He is a son, a brother, a friend, a master, a husband, a lover, an enemy and the list goes on. And each of these alternate planes have its own history of decisions and indecisions. And all these realities are intertwined in a single complex fabric of experiences that encompass the entirety of a person's life memory.

It follows then that if a person sees a pattern that recurs several times in one of his life planes, it is understandable that he take measure to prevent any negative effects that this may bring about. If it persists, then he can continue trying to shield himself or he can simply change the way he looks at it. Maybe the pattern is an integral part of the fabric.

Most of the time, it is.

As such, there would be no sense fighting it as doing so would only disrupt the fabric and possibly even create a tear.

Don't miss the forest for the tree.

Shopping And Finding The One

This is the way I shop.

I go to the store (mall, shop, whatever). I pick-up the item I want. I take it to the cashier and I pay for it. As soon as the item is packed, I take it home.

Straight home.

I don't hang around the shops or the stores after buying something, lest I find something that looks better and/or costs less than what I have thus, ruining the entire "shopping experience".

Sometimes, I can't help but notice another item that looks better than what I just bought.

If this happens, I don't pay attention to it and I just ignore it.

After all, there would always be something that would seem to look better than what I have.

There's no point in looking for the best because the best is, at best, relative.

I was once asked, "How do you know when you've finally found the one?"

The answer is you won’t.

“There were bells on a hill, but I never heard them ringing. Oh, I never heard them at all, till there was you…” is only a song.

It is NOT true.

You'll never know when you've finally found the "one".

The only true thing you can count on is what you’re feeling for the other person – so you better be sure you’re not just helplessly infatuated.

"If that's the case then, how do you know when it's already the right time to tie the knot?"

I usually answer this with what I have come to call, the “Vegetable Scenario”.

Ask yourself, what if right after marrying the person you love, he/she gets in an accident that leaves him/her paralyzed and a vegetable for life. Would you be willing to take care of him day after day after day forever?

That includes cleaning him up when he soils himself, bathing him, making sure he's comfortable and everything - everyday - regardless whether your partner would do it for you had the situation been reversed.

Sounds cynical?

Maybe.

But then, that's what marriage is.

That's precisely the reason why you promise to love each other "for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, till death do you part".

If you can respond to this scenario with an honest "yes" with minimal hesitation, then, you're ready.

Otherwise, you're not.

It’s that simple.

"What if you did tie the knot, and then somewhere along the road you simply realized that you were not meant for each other and/or you met the person who’s truly meant for you?"

First of all, if you really believe in the myth of predestination, then, there's no doubt that you’ll meet the one "destined" for you and there's no point in discussing this further.

The mere fact that you are entertaining the possibility of making a mistake in making the decision already, in itself, denies the truth of predestination (which, in case you hadn't noticed, comes from the word destiny - an event or a course of events that will inevitably happen in the future. The operative word being "inevitable")

If you insist and say you simply realized that you were not meant for each other, then you (or your partner) might not have responded to the “Vegetable Scenario” honestly.

This is where my shopping practice comes in.

Once you've bought what you want, that is - chose to tie the knot with someone, don't linger on the store.

Go home and enjoy what you bought.

Always remember why you fell in love with her/him in the first place and relive it every day.

If you happen to "accidentally" see something that you think is better than the one you bought, ignore it.

The more you expose yourself to questions about the wisdom of your choice, the more confused you will be.

Most of the time, the things that we think make another thing (or someone else, for that matter) better than what we already have is just novelty.

You're just being blinded, distracted and sidetracked by an imagined flaw of that which you already have.

Besides, if you go for the new one, what assurance do you have that this entire cycle won’t happen again?

And if it did, what will you do then?

Drop what you have and pick up what's new?

How many times would you do it? Will you ever be content?

No matter what you do and no matter how careful you are, you really can't have a contingency plan for everything.

You can't prepare for everything.

You can't have the perfect criteria for all your choices, be it a shopping item or the person you'll spend your entire life with.

There's always something or someone better than that which we already have.

I say it again, there's no point in looking for the best because the best is, at best, relative.

The secret is to learn how to be content and to learn how to always go back to our original reasons for doing things.

Just be honest - most of all, to yourself and you'll see what contentment is.

Why demand perfection when you're not perfect yourself?

There will be times that your judgment will be tried, tested and put through the furnace, but never despair. As long as you’re honest with yourself and with everyone concerned, you have nothing to worry about.

After all, you wouldn't want to be the object of the same confused thoughts, right?

Just give your best and expect nothing in return.

That’s not being “martyr-like”.

It’s called living your life the best way you could.

An Un-Funny Joke

It's amazing how easily a facade of normalcy crumbles with the slightest touch or even just a whisper.

Sometimes we go through periods of difficulty and strife that leave us terrified and scarred and utterly confused and even unwilling to move on.

There can even be times when it seems everything is in a state of suspended animation as we stand face to face with situations so far removed from our own perception of reality. And as your entire being goes into shock, you hear a voice screaming, “Why is this happening to me?”

You will yourself to calm down. You convince yourself that this is all just a dream. You force yourself to wake up so you can break free from the nightmare’s brutish grip.

But even after you open your eyes, the truth just blatantly stares you in the face in all its utter monstrosity.

It is real.

It is happening.

It is happening TO YOU!

Such can prove traumatic for anyone. It wouldn't matter if you're a trooper extraordinaire or just an average Joe.

Circumstance has an uncanny way of finding the smallest chink in even the strongest armor.

Is anyone safe? Is anyone immune to the caprices of fickle fate?

We are often taught that when life throws you lemons, make lemonade, sell it for a quarter a glass and keep the proceeds in a piggy bank.

The more lemons, the more lemonade. The more lemonade, the more quarters. The more quarters, the richer you become. Bring it to a roll and soon enough you'll be a millionaire!

Hah! Lemons and millionaires! What a joke!

Yes, life and living it is the greatest adventure of all. But sometimes you simply find yourself way over your head and you wonder where in the world is the reset button.

If only it were that easy.

Change The World by Eric Clapton (covered by Drift)

This is what happens when the person in charge of percussions does not have a steady tempo...


...You'll sound like you're in a hurry to finish the song! :-)

Actually, I was personally in a hurry to finish the song because I haven't bathed yet (as you can probably tell by the way my hair looked and the way I was dressed)